Osho responds to the question of how to be when a beloved dies.
Death has occurred, your beloved is dead. Don’t move in thinking. Don’t do anything, because what can you do which can be of any help? You don’t know. So be in ignorance. Don’t bring in false knowledge, borrowed knowledge. Death is there; you be with it. Face death with total presence. Don’t move in thinking because then you are escaping from the situation, you are becoming absent from here. Don’t think. Be present with the death.
Sadness will be there, sorrow will be there, a heavy burden will be on you – let it be there. It is a part – a part of life and a part of maturity, and part of the ultimate realization. Remain with it, totally present. This will be meditation and you will come to a deep understanding of death. Then death itself becomes eternal life.
But don’t bring in the mind and knowledge. Remain with death; then death will reveal itself to you, then you will know what death is. You will move into the inner mansions of it. Then death will take you to the very center of life – because death is the very center of life. It is not against life, it is the very process of life but the mind brings in the contradiction that life and death are opposites. Then you go on thinking, and because the root is false, the opposition is false, you can never come to any conclusion which can be true and real.
Whenever there is a lived problem, be with the problem without your mind – that’s what I mean by meditation – and just being there with the problem will solve it. And if you have really been there, death will not occur to you again because then you know what death is. We never do this – never with love, never with death, never with anything that is authentic, real. We always move in thoughts, and thoughts are the falsifiers. They are borrowed, not your own. They cannot liberate you. Only the truth that is your own can become your liberation.
(Osho The Book of Secrets)